Golden Hits Vol 1
by Shadow Goat Alice
Summary: THTJB It's 8 days until Christmas and the tenants of Star Gate Tower are getting into the holiday spirit but a surprise guest puts a wrench in Jack's holiday plans.
1. Chapter 1

**_AN:_**_ This was a full on collab between Miss Alice and Mini Goat. It should be read together with 'Much Ado' which is also a full collaboration. We had a blast writing both and hope you guys have nearly as much fun reading though I don't know how that's possible seeing as I laughed so hard I cried a couple times. - **Goat**_

**_AN2:_**_ All four stories, Golden Hits, Much Ado, Coffee Break, and Big Mac Attack are meant to be read back to back as they start December 17_

**Golden Hits**

Chapter 1

**8 days until Christmas**

Sharlynn huffed in the frigid December air. It wasn't any worse than where she'd left a couple hours ago but the snow was deeper. Her bags were still in the rental car as she had no intention of dragging them inside when Jack had large burly buddies that could do it for her.

She beat the snow off her pants and boots before entering the building from the side entrance which required a key. Technically she wasn't supposed to have one but what Jack's boss didn't know wouldn't hurt him. Jack was rarely in his apartment and only in his office when the checks were due or there was a problem that only paperwork would solve so the likelihood of her being able to get in touch with him to let her in was low. Especially when he didn't answer his phone.

Sharlynn was becoming irked with him extremely quickly. At least when he lived with Daniel she could buzz the apartment and be let in. She probably still could have buzzed Daniel. He never seemed to leave except for class or to go on digs and then he was gone for months at a time. She hadn't thought of that at the time though so here she was in the maintenance corridor heading for the lobby which didn't need a key from the inside.

She let herself into his apartment and looked around. It was clean for a change. He must have caught crap from his boss. "Jack! I know you're home, you turd!" She yelled from his living room.

Jack came out of his bedroom, looking disheveled wearing nothing but boxers and sweat. "Shari?!" He yelped. "What are you doing here?"

"If you answered your phone or read your e-mails you'd know the answer to that, butt brain." She huffed at him. "Put some clothes on." She eye rolled then bit her lower lip. Suddenly she had a very good idea why he hadn't been answering his phone. She watched with smug amusement as Jack realized the reason for her reaction.

"Ah… Shari, this is, um, Sam."

Sharlynn crossed her arms over her chest. "Science geek astrophysicist Sam? Who you happened to forget to mention was female and you are sleeping with?"

"Er, yah… about that…" Jack made a motion like he'd have liked to shove his hands in his pockets of his coveralls but he wasn't wearing them so ran them through his hair distractedly instead.

Sharlynn walked over to the blond woman wearing one of her brother's Air Force shirts and apparently little else. "Since my brother has no manners whatsoever, hi, I'm Sharlynn, this loser's sister. It's nice to meet you." She said with an engaging smile so much like Jack's that Sam grinned at her.

"Samantha but you can call me Sam." She said with a grin and shook the proffered hand.

"Anyway, I'm pretty sure I'm interrupting… something." Shar said with an amused grin. "So I'm going to go get some coffee and come back in about an hour when you guys are done with whatever it was you were doing." She said waggling her fingers back and forth descriptively.

Shar left snickering. As she closed the door she heard the woman exclaim "SISTER?!" Then hiss something at Jack low enough that she couldn't catch it but she could guess. There was a strong possibility Jack had never mentioned he had a sibling to this woman.

I think I'll bring them both coffee. She pulled out her phone. "Danny, how does Sam take her coffee?" She asked him as she left the building. "How long has that been going on?... Oh really?" She laughed. "I'm so going to get him for not telling me he has a girlfriend finally. Thanks Danny." She told her brother's best friend and hung up.

_It's about time_. She decided. The protective look Jack had given the blond woman before answering Shar told her this was serious. He loved her.

\- XxX -

"SISTER?!" Sam shouted at him. "When were you planning on telling me you had a sister?" She hissed.

Jack put up his hands in a placating gesture. "Look, I was going to tell you eventually."

"When?" She demanded.

"Well…" Jack hedged. Sam crossed her arms over her chest which made his shirt hike up so high that Jack lost track of what he was going to say.

"Jack!"

"Hmm?" he said distractedly.

Sam huffed.

"Sorry. Could you um…" He looked distractedly at her legs.

Sam stalked up to him and uncrossed her arms to poke a finger at his chest. "Why weren't you answering her calls?" she growled at him.

Jack snatched at her hand and spun them both so she was trapped between the wall and his body. "I was busy." He growled and claimed her mouth with his own. His sister had interrupted them in the middle of some very vigorous mutual intimate exploration. Shar had told them she would be back in an hour. It would be cutting it close but Jack wasn't done yet and Sam being angry at him hadn't cooled him down any.

She kissed him back and dug her fingers into his hips. "I'm still mad at you." She told him.

"S'ok." He said into her neck and he nipped her neck. "I like it a little rough." And he lifted her hips so she had to wrap her legs around him while he walked back to his bedroom, his fingers exploring parts of her that made her moan and dig her hands into his back and bite his shoulder. Jack yelped and gripped her harder as they fell onto the bed.

XxX

Sharlynn stepped into Jaffa Java out of the blustering Colorado snow and looked around for the familiar blue eyed blond she adored so much. The woman was her brother's age, ten years her senior, and had the most adorable little girl she'd ever laid her eyes on. Sharlynn spent most of the time she visited her brother in this coffee shop, since she was a bit of an addict, and had quickly befriended the owner. Everyone seemed to gravitate towards Jeanie Miller. There was just something about her that was so genuine and kind. She was a stark contrast to her brother.

"Shari!" She heard Jeanie's voice as the woman stood up from behind the pastry case, pushing a tall muscular man with dreadlocks away from the register as Sharlynn moved up to stand at the counter.

"I didn't know you planned to come for Christmas! Jack hasn't said a word. Although, he hasn't been in much lately."

"Well I had to schedule a surprise visit since the idiot hasn't been answering my calls or emails." Sharlynn scoffed.

"He hasn't?" Jeanie looked surprised.

"Nope" she said, making a small popping sound with her lips. "So tell me, how long has he been courting the scientist?"

"Who, Daniel?"

Sharlynn stood speechless for a moment, staring at Jeanie in wonder, before she managed a strangled "What?"

"Well, that's the rumor from the tenants." She said, shrugging, while the man snorted beside her.

"Jeanie, Jack isn't gay." Sharlynn managed to squeak out.

"Well I didn't think he seemed the type, but you can't always tell, you know?"

Sharlynn started laughing then. The students who were sitting in the coffee shop doing their homework began looking up to stare at her as she continued to laugh uncontrollably.

She looked at Jeanie, finally pulling herself together enough to speak through her laughter. "How…" gasp "how many people…" snicker "think that…" snort "think that Jack…" gasp "Jack is gay?" She managed before dissolving into laughter again.

"See I told you." The man said, rolling his eyes at Jeanie.

Sharlynn took a deep settling breath, and stood to look at Jeanie, still huffing with amusement.

"Who the hell are you?" She asked, looking at the man.

"Name's Ronon." The man said, reaching out to shake her hand, an amused smirk on his face.

Sharlynn shook his hand, and immediately turned her attention back to Jeanie, having finally composed herself she asked the question again.

"Jeanie, how many people think my brother is gay?" She asked again.

"Uh… well, from what I've heard, the entire complex."

That sent Sharlynn into another fit of laughter. She slumped over the counter, laughing too hard to hold herself up. This was gold. This was pure, unadulterated gold. The entire complex thinks her brother - the very one who had a different girlfriend every week in high school - was gay. This had to be the best Christmas ever.

"Okay, I get it, he's not gay." Jeanie said, sounding slightly embarrassed.

Sharlynn pulled herself together once more. "I'm sorry. It's just that you have no idea how much fun I get to have at his expense now that I have this knowledge." She took another steadying breath. "So wait, how long have people thought this?"

"I have no idea. It's not like I live there. I only know what Jenn and Rhea say. Oh, and sometimes Janet comes in here… that woman is the town gossip."

"This is hysterical! Oh man, I'm gonna hold this over Jack's head for the rest of his life."

"Wait, if you don't mean Daniel, then what scientist-" Realization dawned on Jeanie's face.

"Yup." She made another popping noise. "So, tell me, what's her 'go to' coffee?" She already knew because she asked Daniel earlier, but she wanted to see if Jeanie actually knew who she meant.

"A mochaccino." Jeanie replied, confirming Sharlynn's suspicions.

"Ew." Sharlynn wrinkled her nose in distaste. She hadn't done this to Daniel on the phone, because she knew him well enough to know it would hurt his feelings - unless it came from Jack of course. Jeanie, on the other hand, would play along with her.

"Hey, just because you're some weird coffee snob Puritan doesn't mean other people can't enjoy a little sugar."

"More like a lot of sugar." Sharlynn rolled her eyes melodramatically.

"Alright, well give me a large latte, a large mochaccino, and a peppermint mocha. Oh, and an espresso shot. Make the shot for here and the rest for later to go. I'm gonna hang out for a bit before I head back."

"Sounds good. Mind if I have a shot with you?"

"Please do!" Sharlynn replied, eyes sparkling as she pulled out a wad of cash to pay for her drinks.

Sharlynn spent quite some time with Jeanie, chatting about Sam and Jack. She grilled Jeanie for as much information as she could get about Sam, but she really didn't know much about her. Most of what she knew came from Rodney and Jenn. Rodney considered her a dumb blonde with legs for days, and Jenn was a bit anti-social. She came in with Sam every now and again, but it sounded like she pretty much kept to herself. Jeanie did say that from her own interactions with Sam, she seemed friendly enough.

"Honesty, Shar. If you want to get to know her, you need to spend some one on one time with her." Jeanie said, picking at the scone she grabbed before taking her break.

"She's a biker chick." Ronon supplied, seeming to appear from nowhere. "A hot biker chick. I could give it a go and let you know if she's loose."

Sharlynn looked up at him. He had a twinkle in his eye but she could sense a hint of seriousness.

"You're a pig." Sharlynn stated nonchalantly.

"Well, worth a shot." He shrugged.

Sharlynn couldn't quite get a read on the guy, but she was fairly certain she didn't like him.

"Get back to work, you pervert." Jeanie said, shooing him back toward the register.

"Yeah, yeah." He muttered, casually walking away.

"I know!" Jeanie said, completely unfazed by the awkward interruption. "You could take her Christmas shopping. Just you girls. It will give you a chance to get to know her!"

"Yeah, that doesn't sound like a bad plan. Alright, thanks Jeanie! I guess I should get those drinks and head back, they should be done having sex by now."

"Ew, Shar, why would you say that?" Jeanie said in feigned disgust as she motioned for Ronon to start Sharlynn's to go order.

"You didn't see the state I found them in." Sharlynn replied, laughing mercilessly.


	2. Chapter 2

"Hey Shaft, what's up." Jack said into his cell as he laid stripped down on his bed, pinning Sam down so she couldn't get up and angrily storm out of his apartment. She was clearly still mad he hadn't told her about his sister, but the hate sex had been phenomenal.

"Thought I'd tell you to put some pants on, 'cause your sister just left the coffee shop." Cam said through the receiver.

"Shit. Thanks man." Jack said, quickly abandoning his ploy to keep Sam in his bed and climbing off the bed looking for a set of boxers. "So what did she say to you?"

"Say? Nothing. She didn't even see me. Your sister is damn oblivious man."

"Or maybe she just forgot you existed." Jack retorted, pulling on his jeans and mouthing to Sam that Sharlynn was on her way.

"Yeah. Good thing too since I got to hear her entire conversation with Jeanie. Come on man, not telling your girl about your sister? That's fucked up."

"Hey, I'll have you know-wait. She was talking about it - there? Did she say who?"

"Didn't have to say who man, what other scientist do you know drinks a mochaccino?"

Jack groaned. "This is why I didn't want Shar to know. She's going to blab to the entire damn-shit I gotta go. she's here." He hurriedly grabbed a t-shirt from the floor as he heard the spare key turn in his lock.

"Yeah. Whatever man. You know, hiding your girlfriend from your sister is bad enough, hiding your sister from your girlfriend? That's a real dick move. Also, makes you look kinda creepy not wanting the chick you're banging to know you've got a sister."

"That's gross Cam. I gotta go." He snapped the phone shut and threw it onto the bed just before Sharlynn called out from the kitchen area.

"You two decent yet? I brought coffee."

Jack looked at Sam, fully dressed now, with a small fire burning behind her blue eyes. He didn't like pissing her off, but damn was she hot when she was angry. It made him want to throw her back down on the bed.

"Decent!" She called out to Sharlynn, squinting her eyes at Jack as though she could hear his thoughts.

Sam brushed past him and into the other room. He followed quietly. Sharlynn was standing by his table, pulling coffee drinks out of a drink tray. She turned and handed one to Sam.

"Mochaccino for the lady. And a peppermint mocha for asshole over here." Sharlynn said, thrusting a drink at him.

"How..?" Sam asked, looking surprised.

"I know people." Sharlynn replied, smiling at Sam.

"Thanks, Shar-" Jack started, planning to apologize to the both of them for hiding them from one another.

"Ah!" Sharlynn cut him off, holding her hand in the air towards him. "The coffee is a consolation prize. I'm stealing your woman."

"Excuse me?!" Sam exclaimed, looking very much like she had just been slapped on the ass by a stranger.

"Ew, no. I meant shopping!" Sharlynn said, giving Sam a pointed look.

"Oh! Okay." Sam replied, still looking a little uncertain before shooting Jack an angry glance. "Then let's go."

Sharlynn grinned maniacally, grabbing her coffee in one hand and Sam in the other, then gleefully marched toward the front door.

"Wait!" Jack pleaded. "Just one thing before you go, promise me you won't tell anyone else."

"Tell anyone else what?" Sharlynn replied, shooting him a dark look.

Jack shifted uncomfortably under his sister's stare. He had never hidden anything from her before, and he knew she was pissed.

"It's just… we're not telling anyone yet. About us."

"Oh don't worry, from what I hear everyone thinks you and Danny are having the gayest sex in the state." Sharlynn replied evilly, gaining an odd look from Sam. "But sure, mum's the word."

And with that the two women turned and stormed from his apartment with a fury that could make a grown man shake in his boots.

"Well that went well." He muttered to the empty room sardonically.


	3. Chapter 3

The mall was filled with people bustling around in search of last minute Christmas gifts. There was a huge fir tree decorated to the nines, and a line a mile long of kids waiting for Santa. There was even a choir nearby accepting tips while they sang Christmas carols in four part harmony. This was Sharlynn's favorite time of year. When she was young, she remembered her mom taking them out and spoiling them with gifts since she couldn't be there for Christmas Day, and some of her favorite memories were wandering the mall with her mom and her big brother. Of course mom was a source of tension for the two, and Sharlynn had agreed years ago to never bring her up around her brother. It was really too bad he hated her so much, mom was great.

Sharlynn turned and grinned at Sam before breaking into song. "It's the most wonderful tiiiiime of the yeaar!"

The outbreak gained her some stares but Sharlynn didn't mind. She was a singer after all, and confidence was one thing she'd never had a problem with. Besides, it got her the result she was looking for; Sam giggled.

"So you're a singer?" Sam asked, as they stopped by a kiosk of calendars.

"Among other things." Sharlynn replied. "So, I have to get Christmas presents for everyone because I didn't want to haul them down here. Do you have any shopping left to do?"

"Well, I want to do something special for Jenn because she's had a bit of a rough year, and doesn't really seem to be in the Christmas spirit. And of course, I have no idea what to get Jack."

"Well, Jack is easy! There's a new album from the Met of _Lucia_, he'd love to have that on his shelf. Now who is Jenn?" Sharlynn said as she laced her arm through Sam's and began leading her toward the record store.

"Jenn is.. a girl who lives a few doors down from me."

"Okay, vague." Sharlynn laughed while she rolled her eyes. "What's she like?"

"Well, she's young - 17 actually, and already a grad student. So she's smart. She doesn't really seem interested in much other than coffee and science to be entirely honest. But she's had a tough time, she moved in with her cousin Rhea over the summer and then Rhea just up and left the same night."

As they spoke they negotiated their way onto the escalator. Once on the escalator, Sharlynn turned to look at Sam in shock.

"Whoa, you have a 17 year old neighbor living by herself? What is this, a sitcom?"

Sam giggled. "Well, we kind of sorted it out for her, and her parents are okay with it. We all look out for her, she's kind of like all of our responsibility, but don't tell her that she'd be pissed if she knew."

"Shar!" They heard a voice as they reached the second floor. Sharlynn turned to see her very own cousin marching towards her with a huge grin on his face.

"Bub! How the hell are you!?" Sharlynn exclaimed, embracing her favorite cousin.

"Oh you know me. Same ol, same ol. You didn't tell me you would be in town!"

"Well, Jack has been ignoring my calls so it was kind of a last minute trip."

Mac looked at her in concern. "That doesn't sound like him. Do I need to have a little chat with your brother about his manners?"

"No, I solved the mystery." She said, turning to smile at Sam only to find her staring in shock and awe at the two of them.

"Oh, hey Sam." Mac said smiling at her. "Shar, how do you know one of my star students?"

Sam blushed furiously and examined the floor. Sharlynn began debating how much she should tell her cousin, and decided she'd call to give him all the details away from Sam.

"Ran into her at the complex. She's one of Jack's tenants, and she offered to take me shopping. Since I'm a bit behind on Christmas gifts myself."

"Alright, I'll see you both for Christmas dinner at dad's right? I gotta get moving though, prep some tests for finals. Say hi to Danny for me! See you in class Sam."

And with that Mac turned and headed on his way.

"Well at least I wasn't the only one kept in the dark about my brother's love life." Sharlynn laughed, patting Sam on her back. "Though I'm surprised he never told you Bub was his cousin. He usually brags about that to all the science students on campus. Professor Mac is a legend."

"Oh he's a legend all right" Sam said thoughtfully

\- XxX -

After a day of shopping, Sam and Sharlynn returned to the complex loaded down with their spoils. They took everything to Sam's apartment before separating the bags of stuff they'd selected for Jenn's surprise and broke into her apartment. Sam was surprisingly good at picking locks.

By the time Jenn returned from class, they had completely decked out her apartment. There were garlands hanging from every wall, lights strewn across the ceiling, and even a little snow scene on one of the tables complete with a miniature Christmas tree and a dozen small ceramic houses. They had even talked Daniel into picking up a small tree which was now covered in lights, ornaments, and tinsel. Sharlynn footed the brunt of the bill, as she had enough money left from her grandparent's estate to ensure she'd never want for anything.

When they heard Jenn put the key into her lock they tried to look as casual as possible while they moved to stand by the door.

"What the fuck?" Jenn said in shock as the door swung open. Her eyes landed on Sam and Sharlynn as she took in the scene.

"Sam? Did you do this?"

"I had help." Sam said, smiling as she gestured to Sharlynn.

"Holy shit guys! It's fucking magical in here! Where did you get all this stuff?" Jenn was clearly still processing, but Sharlynn could tell the girl was thrilled.

"That's not really important." Sharlynn replied. "Do you like it?"

"Are you kidding? I love it!" Jenn exclaimed, pulling Sam into a red-eyed hug. She pulled back and looked at Sharlynn, unsure. Sharlynn decided to just go for it, and pulled the young woman into a hug herself.

After the shock began to wear off, Jenn finally gave Sharlynn a long look and said "So, who exactly are you?"

"Hmm? Oh I'm Jack's sister. Sharlynn is the name."

"Jack has a sister?!" Jenn replied in shock.

"Seriously, does no one know I exist? I'm hurt." Sharlynn scoffed. "You know, it used to be him and me versus the world, now he doesn't even tell his friends I exist. Well hey, I should let you two chat. I gotta go get my things sorted into Danny's spare room. It was nice to meet you both."

Sharlynn closed the door as she left and pulled out her cell, calling Mac as she slipped onto the elevator. "Hey Bub… Oh I'm gonna explain it all to you over drinks. Yeah, I can be there in thirty. Oh and get this, half the damn complex doesn't even know I exist! Yeah! And here I thought Jack and I were close… yeah I probably shouldn't-oh shit I left my things in Sam's apartment. Make that forty minutes. Yeah, okay, I'll see you there.


	4. Chapter 4

**7 days until Christmas**

It was early the next morning and Jack had come up to Sam's apartment with a peace offering of egg sandwiches and treats for Shroe. She was still miffed at him but let him in anyway.

"Look Sam," he started and raked his hand through his hair. He'd been so upset about her being mad at him that he hadn't gone to his woodshop first. He didn't have the focus after not being able to sleep. "I should have told you I had a sister a few weeks ago on the roof when we decided to start dating but I had other things on my mind and then it just didn't really come up again. You don't really talk about your family much so I figured mine wasn't that important to you."

Sam snatched her sandwich and hash brown and plopped onto her couch in the middle so he had to sit next to her regardless of where he sat.

"So this is my fault?" She asked him in a deceptively mild voice.

"No." He said quickly. He knew that trick. Sara used to pull it on him until he figured out this was not a statement you agree with even if you agree with it. Jack sat down, put down his food and gently pried hers out of her hands and put it down too. She was wearing the softest looking sweater he'd ever seen and he gently tugged her against his chest. She resisted at first but eventually Sam lay against Jack's chest on the couch. He idly fingered the hem of her deep green cashmere sweater.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Shari. My family situation was always a bit of a mess. She doesn't remember our parents arguing all the time or using us as pawns. For a long time they made me feel like it was my fault they fought all the time. Momar had enough and got Granfar to apply for custody after mom dropped us off and didn't come back for over a month. Dad only seemed to want to see us when it would hurt mom and mom was too busy trying to reclaim the life she thought dad stole from her by getting married early. Shari was so little that she didn't understand what was going on, just that mom and dad spoiled her all the time when we had to go see either of them."

"How old were you?"

"I was ten when she was born, the fighting started almost right away again so I was already taking care of her most of the time. I think my folks thought having another baby would save their marriage. I love my sister and I'd do anything for her but they should have just gotten divorced."

"How long did they last after she was born?"

"Around two years. She was still a toddler and I was in junior high. I cut ties with dad when I was about sixteen and he spent the entire time we visited him drunk or stoned, I'm not sure which. I took Shari to the mall and bought her a bunch of stuff with his credit card to get even. She loved it. I think she still has the doll I bought her that day. My Friend something or other. She had one already so I got her the red head."

"You remember that day pretty vividly." Sam told him, her fingers stroking the hair at the base of his neck.

"I remember being furious at dad but not wanting Shari to know so I just made it into this really fun day for her. I'd always been a little protective of her before that but after I think I just got really territorial about it. When we got home I told Momar and Granfar that they could not make me go see him again and I wasn't taking Shari either. He drank himself to death a few months later. I thought that was my fault too for a long time." He admitted with a sigh.

"Oh Jack." Sam told him softly and hugged him as tightly as she could.

"He was already on that path so it probably had nothing to do with not being allowed to see us. Honestly I don't even know that he knew Momar was defying the court order. He was out of it by then." His hand slipped into her still short hair - she'd gotten it styled again as it had grown out some.

"I'm not close with mom. We didn't get along great when I was younger and there hasn't been anything to change that. Momar died right before I graduated the Academy and Granfar a year later. It's just been Shari and I for a long time. Mom wasn't reliable for anything but guilt riddled gifts and butting into my personal life. We don't talk now but Shari still keeps in touch.

"I didn't say anything about Mac or Uncle James because it didn't seem important and I didn't want things to be weird that you're dating your professor's cousin." He said with a long sigh. "Look Sam, I don't think of this stuff so just… ask if you're interested, ok?"

"You were named for your uncle?"

"Middle name, yah. Not sure where Jonathan came from. You would have to ask mom."

"Do you want me to keep it to myself when I'm in class? Us dating."

"Shari is probably telling him right now. He might give you some weird looks when you get back from holiday break. If it doesn't interfere with your plans with your dad and brother, I usually drive up to Uncle James' place for Christmas morning but it's only forty bucks if you don't want to drive for sixteen hours."

\- XxX -

"Janet, I'm telling you, my brother is _not _gay." Sharlynn said wearily. She had stopped by Janet's place to find out how many people in the complex mistakenly believed Jack was gay, and instead had spent the last hour instead trying to convince Janet he wasn't.

"Oh come on Shar, how can you be so blind? He's your own brother after all." Janet said as she approached Sharlynn with a measuring tape.

"That's exactly my point Janet! He's my brother. I think I'd know if he was gay. What are you doing?"

As they spoke Janet had begun taking Sharlynn's measurements. She hadn't even noticed at first and subconsciously went along with it. Now Janet had her standing with her arms stretched to the sides and was measuring her bust.

"Hmm? Oh I'm measuring you for a costume. Mary said she wanted to make you a new one for the New Year's party but she doesn't have your current measurements. You _are _coming to the New Years party, right?"

"Yeah. But why do I need a costume for that?" Sharlynn replied, swatting Janet away from her as she began trying to measure her hips.

"Just hold still! I'm almost done. And she said the theme is a surprise, but she's making everyone a new costume as a Christmas gift, and they are expected to wear them at the New Year's party."

"Uh huh." Sharlynn replied in disbelief. "And I'm sure it has nothing to do with your usual BMI check I avoid when I come to town."

"Now I certainly have no idea what you're talking about." Janet replied mischievously.

"Whatever. Janet look, I can understand why you might think Daniel is gay. I mean, you've seen his sweater collection. Not to mention his choice in alcoholic drinks. But Jack? Really?"

"Stop moving, you're making it hard to measure your waist. And look, Shar, you don't see them every day like I do. Trust me, they're a couple."

"No Janet, they're not. They're no more a couple than you and I are."

"Uh huh. Sure. Here hold this to the top of your head." Janet handed her the end of the tape and kneeled down, pulling it to the floor so she could measure Sharlynn's height.

"God Janet, you are impossible. Look, I'll prove it to you, but you can't say anything to _anyone_ okay? I've been sworn to secrecy."

"Okay, shoot."

"Jack is sleeping with Sam." Sharlynn dropped a bombshell on Janet but she did _not _react the way she'd expected. In fact, Janet reacted in much the same way Sharlynn had to the news people thought her brother was gay; by doubling over in laughter.

When Janet composed herself she stood up to her full height of 5'4" and looked up to give Sharlynn a stern look. Sharlynn had four inches on the woman, but it didn't make her any less terrifying.

"Don't lead poor Sam on. She's got it bad, and that's really not fair to her." Janet said sternly. "Now, I just need to get your body length-"

"Mark my words Janet," Sharlynn said, tossing the measuring tape to the floor for dramatic effect. "I _will_ prove to you my brother isn't gay." Then she turned and stormed out of the apartment. Or rather, _attempted_ to storm out of the apartment, for the measuring tape she's thrown to the floor had gotten wound up around her feet, causing her to trip and fall flat on her face.

Janet began to laugh after it was clear the only thing Sharlynn had bruised in her fall was her ego. Sharlynn began to angrily untangle her legs, and attempted to stand up, failing twice before she successfully made it to her feet and through the door. When she tried to slam the door angrily, it slipped through her fingers at the last second, feebly swinging back open. She marched away hearing Janet's tinkling laughter as she considered murdering the woman.

"God, why do I even bother? Let them all think he's gay. It's not like it actually matters."


	5. Chapter 5

**4 days until Christmas**

Jenn was sitting at her laptop running some calculations on her implementation plans for the clean energy project Rodney had dropped the ball on. Professor Mac had seemed really pleased with her plans to encourage conversion of waste facilities into methane producers by having electric companies pay a fee for such usage. And then he'd asked the hardball question; how would you promote this to privately owned utility companies and waste management sights alike? He asked her to write up a proposal with cost and profit figures for both companies.

So now here she sat in her delightfully decked out living room, typing up the beginnings of a proposal her professor asked her to prepare over the holiday. Sure, she had a month. But really, what else would she be doing right now? There was a knock at the door, and Jenn looked up in surprise. Making her way to the door, she opened it and found herself even more surprised to see Sharlynn O'Neill standing on her doorstep with a box of doughnuts and two coffees.

"Hi!" Sharlynn said cheerfully, handing Jenn one of the coffees before pushing past her into her apartment.

"Hi…" Jenn mumbled belatedly, wondering what bad joke this was about to turn into. As she closed the door she turned to follow Sharlynn and asked "Can I help you?"

"As a matter of fact, you can!" Sharlynn replied, setting the donuts on her breakfast bar. "You see, I don't really know who to turn to. And you seem like the kind of person who can keep their mouth shut. So I was really hoping I could pick your brain about a specific person."

"Daniel?" Jenn asked, figuring Sharlynn would want to know about her brother's current squeeze.

Sharlynn looked very much like a petulant child when Jenn spoke. "What? No. I've known Daniel for years. God, why does everyone think Jack is gay?"

Sharlynn moves through the room to sit at the table with Jenn's computer. Jenn grabbed her cup and moved to fill it with more coffee, getting a second mug from the cabinet to fill for Sharlynn.

"So Jack's not gay?" Jenn replied after processing the information Sharlynn had provided her with for a few moments.

"No. He's not. Why would you think that?"

"Well, Janet said… and then Eli… you know honestly Jack makes way more sense now." Jenn set down a fresh coffee in front of Sharlynn as the neurons fired in her brain making a connection she should have made months before. "Oh my god he's dating Sam."

"Wow. That was a quick realization." Sharlynn said, appraising her curiously.

"Well honestly, who else would get Jack a shirt that says The universe is made up of Protons, Neurons, Electrons, and Morons?" Jen sat back down in front of her laptop, closing it and pushing it off to the side so she and Sharlynn could have a normal conversation.

Sharlynn snorted. "Oh my god that is a great shirt."

"I know! Finally I know who to ask about where to get it!" Jenn wrapped her hands around her coffee mug lovingly and reveled in the warmth and smell permeating off of it. Coffee really was god's gift to man.

"I'm surprised she didn't think of getting you one. Sam seems to really like you."

Jenn smiled at Sharlynn cheerfully. "She does?"

"You seem surprised."

"Well, I wasn't exactly gifted with social graces. I mean hell, I'm so bad with people my own cousin let me move in with her and then skipped town the same night." Jenn picked at something nonexistent in her coffee, a feeling of discomfort settling over her as she thought of Rhea.

"I highly doubt that has anything to do with you. From what Sam said, it sounds like your cousin is a supreme flake."

"Wait, if you spent so much time with Sam, why do you need to ask me about her?"

"Let's just say, I want to make sure my suspicions are correct. Also, Jack is clearly head over heels and… I mean, I like Sam so far, she seems really nice, and not at all like his ex Sara. But I want to make sure my brother doesn't get his heart dismantled again."

Jenn smiled at her. "You're a really good sister."

"Thanks!" Sharlynn beamed back at her. "Honestly it's been just Jack and I for as long as I can remember… I want to make sure he's happy."

"Well, what do you want to know about Sam?"

"Just… your impressions of her. What's she like?"

Jenn contemplated for a moment, smiling as she thought back to their first encounter so many months ago. How Sam had held her hand for the first day of classes by leading her to the school, showing her around the bookstore, helping her find the books Professor Mac had assigned which were _not _in the bookstore - and to be entirely honest, were not something she expected to be purchasing as a junior.

"Sam is… the only reason I'm here." Jenn said thoughtfully. "I was ready to just give up that morning when I woke up to Rhea's note. Throw in the towel and go home. It was like, I hadn't even been here for a day and already this town felt like it was rejecting me in the form of my very own cousin."

Sharlynn was watching her sympathetically. Jenn shook her head and continued.

"I don't need sympathy I'm not that kind of girl." She laughed. "But I'll tell you this, Sam opened her door at the ass crack of dawn to a bitchy teenager who hadn't even had her morning coffee. She didn't even hesitate; she took me for coffee, helped me pull myself together, hell she even talked to Jack for me about letting me stay in the apartment. He came up with some scholarship program I am ninety nine percent sure doesn't actually exist, but you never look a gift horse in the mouth." She took an exaggerated sip of her coffee for emphasis.

Sharlynn snickered. "Okay I get it. Sam is an angel."

"If you're worried about Jack getting his heart broken, don't. Sam wouldn't do that. I mean, Jack would have to do something pretty damn stupid…"

"Like hide his sister's existence from his girlfriend?"

"He didn't!"

"Oh he did. But Sam seems to have gotten over it quickly enough."

"Dumbass. So Jack is straight. Does that mean Daniel is too?" Jenn asked, wondering about the girl she sometimes saw him chatting up at the coffee shop.

Sharlynn snickered. "Yeah Daniel is straight. I can't help but wonder who started that rumor though. I figured most people had known Jack was couch surfing after his divorce."

"Well it only takes one gossip to start a rumor."

"Janet?" Sharlynn surmised.

"Janet." Jenn agreed, rolling her eyes.


	6. Chapter 6

Sharlynn settled into her seat at the burger joint next to Cam and across from Daniel. Shar was no fool, and knew Cam had a massive crush on her. She just chose to ignore it.

"Okay Danny, I know you didn't just bring me to lunch for laughs. What's up? Also why is Shaft here?"

"Well, Eli told me, that Walter told him, that Siler told him, that Mary told him, that Janet said you've been trying to convince her Sam and Jack are a couple. Shar, you can't go around telling people about this."

"I didn't realize that telling the truth was so frowned upon." Sharlynn said, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms over her chest.

"Look, that's hardly the point. Jack has made it pretty clear he doesn't want anyone to know yet." Daniel said diplomatically, taking a sip of his drink.

"Danny, I was just trying to tell Janet that Jack isn't gay. Can you believe she thinks his own sister wouldn't know?"

Daniel choked on his drink, and Cam started laughing.

"No way. They think he's gay?" Cam managed through the laughter.

"That was my reaction!" Sharlynn appreciated not being the only one to find her brother's current situation rather comedic.

"Man! That's a riot!"

"Well, it doesn't really matter does it?" Daniel managed to say while wiping spilled soda from his shirt.

"You know they think you're gay too right?" Sharlynn said, leaning toward him over the table. She didn't miss the fact that Cam copied her movement, leaning slightly closer to her.

Daniel sputtered, and Sharlynn was pleased. He was a hard man to leave speechless, but now, here he was opening and closing his mouth, looking very much like a large fish.

"As gay as a spring parade." Sharlynn said smugly. "Janet got all pissed at me for giving Sam too much hope. She said I'm not around enough to notice how obvious it is you and Jack are in a relationship."

"Whoa wait, Danny and Jack? A couple? Hah! I gotta write this shit down." Cam said, digging around in Shar's purse for a pen.

"What the hell do you think you're doing flyboy?" Sharlynn said, swatting him away from her purse.

"Hey, you have a lifetime's worth of dirt to hold over Jack's head, I gotta catch up." Cam said, spreading his hands out in a pleading gesture.

"Well, use your own damn pen. Or better yet, memorize that shit."

Daniel was still staring at Sharlynn in shock, processing what he had just been told. Finally, he came out of his reverie and began speaking, slow and calculated.

"So, Janet think's I'm gay."

"As a spring parade." Sharlynn said proudly. Finally, she may have won him over.

"Well that explains why she didn't like me back…" Daniel muttered so quietly Sharlynn almost hadn't heard him.

"Sorry Danny." Shar winced.

"Those people who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do." Cam quoted.

"Isaac Asimov?" Sharlynn asked, looking at him in slight surprise. She'd always pegged Cam as an idiot, but maybe she had been wrong.

"Speaking of knowing everything," Daniel started, seeming to have been shocked back into reality by Cam's quote. "The fact is, you _don't _know everything, Shar. I know you've always been there for your brother, and you know how much Sara broke him, but he hid the worst of it from you."

Sharlynn looked at Daniel with concern. "How bad was it?"

"Bad."

"Daniel, what actually happened between him and Sara? I asked him way back when but he wouldn't tell me anything. Just said it didn't work out."

"Well…" Daniel sighed, looking resigned. "You know how Jack has always wanted kids, right?"

"Well, duh. Jack not being a dad would be tragic. But Sara wanted kids too, like a pile of them."

"Well, that's what she told him when they were dating."

"Wait, Sara didn't want kids?"

"Nope. She just told him that so he'd marry her. When he started pushing the topic she told him flat out that it was never going to happen. That was before he was discharged. She was even telling him flat out that once he got his first assignment, she planned to stay where she was. Jack actually thought she might be happy he got discharged since she didn't want to move."

"And then?" Shar was getting more and more pissed by the minute.

"Well when he got discharged she was livid. She told him he was a loser and a failure and he 'damn well better find a way to support her or she was going to leave'."

"So that's why he took all those odd jobs." Shar spit angrily. She could feel an angry flush climbing up her neck, and realized she was going to have a hard time not hunting the bitch down. No one fucks with her brother like that. _No one._

"Then, if you'll believe it, she got pissed he was never around."

"What?"

Daniel nodded somberly.

"You're telling me that after she told him she wouldn't go with him, but was pissed he got discharged - which would insinuate she didn't mind him being away for work, she got pissed that he was _away_ for _work_?"

"Yeah. That was when things really started to go downhill. Jack worked his ass off to try and keep his marriage. He sent her gifts and money when he was away, pampered her when he was home, and did everything he could think of to make her happy. She was manipulative and abusive, and honestly, I don't think Jack could have done anything right in her eyes."

"That fucking bitch." Shar hissed, clenching her fist on the table.

"Yeah Jack was pretty tore up." Cam said quietly. Sharlynn had almost forgotten he was there, but Cam had known Jack almost as long as Daniel, and if there were two people in the world who understood what Jack was going through, it was them.

"That's why he doesn't want people to know Shar. He got his heart dragged through the wringer last time; it took months for him to even start acting like himself. Honestly I think- "Daniel hesitates, looking ashamed.

"Think what Daniel?" Sharlynn pushed.

"Jack was…"

"Suicidal." Cam supplied, bluntly.

"Wait, you think that, or you know that?" Sharlynn was worried. How did she miss all of this? How did he manage to hide it all from her? She thought she'd been a good sister. But now she comes to find out all this stuff she wasn't even here to help her brother through, and she felt like shit. She should have known. She should have been helping him.

"We think." Daniel said.

"We _know._" Cam spoke simultaneously.

They glared at one another. If it weren't for the topic at hand, Shari would have found their interaction comedic.

"We can't know for sure. It's not like he ever said anything."

"Danny, he literally tried to drink himself to death. How much more clear can you get?"

"His wife had just left him, Cam, that would make me drink too."

"Drink what? Those fruity girly drinks with the fruit spear in them?"

"Hey, just because I have taste doesn't mean I don't have feelings!"

"Taste? You call that taste! No wonder everyone thinks you're gay."

"Hey now, that's not fair! Besides, Jack drinks whiskey and beer and everyone thinks _he's _gay too."

"Pfft. Only by association."

"_Boys!_" Sharlynn exclaimed, interrupting their squabble. At least the two were entertaining. "Was there a point to all of this?"

"Yes." Daniel said, shooting one final glare at Cam. "Stop telling people about him and Sam. He'll let everyone know when he's ready. Okay?"

"Yeah, okay." Sharlynn grumbled.


	7. Chapter 7

**3 days until Christmas **

The tree Teal'c had dragged into the Gate Room was massive. Siler had to get the maintenance ladder to decorate the top of it. By tradition, the youngest tenants were in charge of making ornaments for the tree every year so Jenn had patiently sat with Cassie and helped her string hundreds of yards of popcorn and Eli had dug through his broken electronics and used motherboards and other ridiculous things to glue craft and dollar store bits onto until they looked like ornaments. Jack tried not to tear his hair out when he found the kids using his coping saw to make motherboards into wreaths and trees.

Teal'c and Ray'ac took all this in stride. Cassie finally put her foot down and made Ray join in the ornament making with her small fists on her hips and a glare so much like her mother's that Ray'ac had meekly complied and started hot gluing things to Eli's ornament bases.

"Eli, aren't you going to help finish the ornaments?" Cassie demanded.

"I did the hard part Cass. I'll help decorate as you get them done." He said with a shrug. He was trying very hard to casually lean next to Jenn like it was just happenstance that he was there.

He was fooling himself, however. Jenn rolled her eyes. "I'll help Cassie. What needs to be done?" She reminded herself Cassie and the other kids were not teenagers and to watch her fucking mouth right now. She gave Eli a withering look. She'd have helped cut the pieces had Eli told her what he was up to with them.

"I will retrieve the star and lights from storage. Jennifer Hailey, you are in charge." Teal'c told her.

"How come she gets to be in charge?" Eli demanded.

"Because she does not spill chemistry experiment chemicals on her uncle's floor requiring me to special order exotic cleaning solutions from Europe Eli Wallace." Teal'c told him.

Jenn laughed at his expense and saluted Teal'c. "Sir yes sir!"

"Indeed." Teal'c said and left to get the star and lights.

\- XxX –

"Alright, here are the rules." Daniel attempted to say over the chattering crowd. "Hello? Is anyone listen- Teal'c?"

"ATTENTION." Teal'c boomed from next to him. The room became silent and turned to stare at the pair. "Daniel Jackson wishes to give us instructions."

"Thank you Teal'c. Now, the rules of the white elephant game goes as follows. I have in my hand a deck of cards. Each of you will take one card, and announce the number on that card. We will then go in order starting with number one. The first person to go will pick a gift, and every person after that has the options to pick a new gift, or steal one. This is where it gets important! If a person can escape your attempt to steal the gift, you must select a gift from the pile, or steal a different gift. Only three attempts are allowed for each gift to be stolen. Likewise, a gift can only be stolen twice. Therefore the third person to end up with the gift in question, will be the one to keep the gift. Does everyone understand?"

The room was filled with a chorus of affirmatives and Daniel continued on. "Finally, there will be no kicking, biting, punching, or restraining, is that clear? You can attempt to steal a gift so long as there is no violent action from either party."

"Just let us play already Danny!" John yelled.

"Alright, fine. Single file to get your cards."

The lineup was anything but single file. Daniel got mobbed, and when the crowd cleared, he was left standing there looking rather disheveled; glasses askew, hair slightly mussed, and Teal'c could swear he saw a cloud of dust floating around him. Daniel coughed awkwardly.

"Okay, who got number one?" He asked, glancing down at the card in his hand to make sure it wasn't him.

Belatedly realizing he was holding two he lifted his hand so Teal'c could take the second one. Teal'c took the card and bowed to Daniel before looking at the card he now held which read six.

"Oh! Sorry guys, that's me." John said, having clearly been distracted by Liz when Daniel asked who got number one.

"Okay John, you know the drill. Pick your gift."

The room grew silent again as everyone watched John walk over to the gifts. He very slowly began examining each one, clearly using the chance to drag it out as long as he could. People began to get impatient, and started yelling directions at him.

"Pick a weird shaped one!" Someone yelled.

"No! Pick that giant one in the corner! We all want to know what it is!" Came another voice

"No! Pick the pink frilly one! I bet it was wrapped that way as a deterrent!" A third voice called out.

John turned to mock glare at the group, and instead picked up a small, simply wrapped gift from the table. He painstakingly opened it as slow as possible, holding eye contact with random individuals as they grew restless.

"Oh just open the damn gift already rookie!" Ford yelled, rolling his eyes with exaggeration.

John grinned childishly, and then began quickly ripping the paper off the gift to reveal a set of walkie talkies.

"Sweet!" John exclaimed looking at the gift with glee, as a small murmur moved around the room. "Hey, don't any of you dare steal this from me! Remember, I've got police training!"

"I said NO violence." Daniel grumbled.

The evening went on in much the same way, until eventually it was Sam's turn to open a gift. Teal'c couldn't quite understand why, but this gift seemed to be an object of great desire for many in attendance at the party. It was a porcelain gravy boat that was shaped and painted to look like a potato, with a matching porcelain spoon.

When Sam opened the gift she squealed with delight, then proceeded to back as far away from the crowd as she could without leaving the room. As the next person - which so happened to be Janet - stepped up to take their turn, she braced herself to run. Janet moved slowly through the pile of remaining gifts, pretending to examine each one, before she turned and took off after Sam. Janet was quick for her size, but with Sam's long legs and military family, Janet was no match. She backed away grumbling picking the first gift she passed by, and seemed pleased to find a beautiful Dutch oven.

The next person who attempted to steal Sam's gravy boat was Sharlynn. She had opened her gift earlier - a Queen Greatest Hits album - but it was stolen from her by Nick Rush, something that surprised everyone in the room. Sharlynn put up a fight before she gave up the album, and then gleefully began chasing Sam around the room. Sharlynn was also surprisingly agile, a trait she must have learned from chasing her brother and cousin around their grandparents' place as a young girl. She managed to tackle Sam, who cradled the gravy boat protectively in her arms as she rolled with ease onto the floor, and softly pushed Sharlynn off with her legs. She then bounced up, leapt over Sharlynn, and ran to hide behind Teal'c. When Sharlynn approached she met Teal'c's eyes, and he merely had to raise an eyebrow for her to back down. It was such a comical reaction from the young woman, that Teal'c almost cracked up laughing.

Finally, one more person tried to steal the gravy boat from Sam, and that was Jack himself. Teal'c surmised his only reason for attempting this was an excuse to wrestle with Sam, but he had no evidence and said nothing. He caught up to her easily, and grabbed her waist from behind, lifting her with ease. He held her in the air for a moment before seeming to realize he had no way of grasping the gravy boat, as he was using both hands to hold her waist. Reluctantly, he set her down onto her feet, and began reaching for the gravy boat with one hand, as he continued to restrain her with the other. Sam called out to Jenn for help, and tossed the boat to her lightly. Jenn snatched it from the air with ease, and took off running while Jack complained that was against the rules, and Sam smugly pointed out Daniel had never said anything about people helping. Finally, Jack gave up, reluctantly letting go of Sam's waist, and opened a new gift.

"Well that was attempt three, so Sam's gravy boat is now officially off limits." Daniel said, looking a little weary from the commotion. It would be a lie to say the evening hadn't turned into utter chaos.

Sam cheered at the revelation as Jenn returned to hand her the gravy boat.

"Sam, I don't know where the spoon went." Jenn told her worriedly as she passed the gravy boat back to her.

"Oh don't worry, I slipped it into my pocket." Sam said, grinning as she pulled the spoon from the back pocket of her tight jeans.

"Of course you did." Jenn laughed.

\- XxX –

After everyone had a chance to switch with someone or viciously guard their prize as Sam had her potato, Jack tugged Shari's sleeve and nodded to Sam. All three of them headed for the piano in the corner where Jack had stashed his guitar behind a chair.

"Show tunes or Christmas music kids?" Jack asked them.

As much as Sharlynn and Sam wanted to bust out the _Sound of Music_, they figured their audience might revolt so Sam dug around for the Christmas music in the bench. "We need more stuff." Sharlynn observed as the pickings were slim.

"I have _Carol of the Bells_ memorized." Sam admitted. "Probably a few others too. Jack, what do you suggest?"

"We always played _Silent Night_ last. Other than that, some stuff for the kids and then some more mature things." He suggested.

"No hippos." Shar said mutinously.

"But I want a-"

"Jack, I will neuter you if you even start playing it." Sharlynn warned him.

"Shari used to work for a fabric store that played it every third song during the holidays." Jack explained to Sam. "She got very… _creative _with the lyrics over time."

"Ah." Was all Sam said assuming the private joke probably made more sense in context.

"Alright, let's start with _White Christmas_. Jack can do a decent Bing." Shari suggested. "How's your voice Sam?"

"Adequate. I'll sing harmony."

"Fair enough." Shari agreed.

Jack took a couple shots of scotch for liquid courage to hit Bing's smooth baritone without switching key mid song, then began strumming his guitar and singing in the lowest range he could manage without hurting himself.

The girls joined him on harmony while Sam played accompaniment on the piano the guys had liberated from the University fire sale and had Ronon's buddy go over and repair until it sounded as good as it had when it was new. Apparently a few damaged hammers had marked it for the trash prior to their timely rescue.

Everyone was feeling fairly mellow at this point so they got a few encouraging cheers to play more. Shari eventually got the crowd worked up enough to sing _Carol of the Bells_ together with some instruction and noted with amusement that Daniel who couldn't carry a tune in a bucket was discreetly taping the whole thing on the camcorder Jack had given him earlier in the night.

As everyone seemed to be flagging and showing signs of getting ready to leave, Jack and Sharlynn gave each other a nod and he started softly playing the chords for _Silent Night_.

"Alright everyone, last song of the night and we sing it together." Sharlynn told them grinning. She knew Jack would opt out of singing because he got too choked up to get through the song.

By the end of the song the whole room was singing or humming along and there were more than a few misty eyes besides Jack's. Sam gave him a soft smile. His flight was early tomorrow morning but they had already decided to spend the night at her place tonight.

Jack's fingers finally stilled and he cleared his throat. "Alright everyone, have a Merry Christmas." He said by way of ending the party and Sam gave his arm a squeeze.

Some of the group were packing up the food to put in the big fridges in the kitchen for the more broke residents to raid over the holidays, others were cleaning up empty cups and used plates. A few others were putting chairs up on tables. Teal'c and Siler would take them back to storage tomorrow or the next day.

Janet had taken a sleepy Cassie to bed when Jack announced the end of the party and never saw Jack and Sam walk out together, fingers entwined.


	8. Chapter 8

Jack had opted to spring for the flight and renting a car when they got into town. It cut down on travel time which gave him more time to snuggle with his adorable new girlfriend. A situation Shari helped him with by quietly getting lost as often as possible.

The cousins had gotten in a habit of buying each other children's toys for Christmas rather than trying to find things that were specific to their adult tastes. Some years it had been 'hey I had this' and others it had been just nonsense like a case of silly putty or Nerf guns. Uncle James tolerated this nonsense with as much graciousness as he could muster seeing as his own father had started the tradition in the first place.

"So what did you get Bub this year?" Sharlynn asked her brother idly while they waited for the aircraft to taxi to the runway.

"And have you blab to him? No thanks. Not telling." Jack said absently while he thumbed through the latest Asimov Foundation book.

"Excuse me?" She said sharply to him.

Jack winced internally. You'd think I'd learn he groused to himself. "You're very open Shari. It makes you a good person."

"But not one you tell secrets too like you have a girlfriend that you are head over heals in love with." She said snidely.

"Look it's not like that. When I met her, she had just left a guy. I met him later. He really worked her over emotionally and she was in a bad place. If I'd hooked up with her then it would have lasted about five minutes and then we'd have to live in the same complex for a year."

She looked at her brother. 'Oh Jack, you fell for her right a way and were protecting your heart from getting shattered again,' she thought. "You still should have called me when things got serious Jack. Do you have any idea what it was like walking into your apartment and almost being greeted by your naked butt?" She said with a chuckle.

"Awkward…" Jack said, blushing slightly.

"Worse than the time I came home and you had Candice on your lap in Granfar's lounge chair and she had nothing on." She pointed out to him.

"Ok, you made your point Shari, I'm sorry. I should have called you or at least wrote you a letter. But I know how excited you get about me having someone in my life and if it was some rebound thing I didn't want you to get your hopes up."

"What - that you might be normal and marry someone right for you and give me some nieces and nephews to smother?"

"Something like that, yah."

"I'm thinking four kids, two of each if you can manage it. More if Sam is up for the challenge."

Jack looked at her horrified. "You keep your big Catholic family fantasies to yourself. I'm good with two kids myself."

"Oh come on, Jack, don't you wish we had like, six other siblings to blame things on?"

Jack laughed.

\- XxX –

They got to Uncle James's house early afternoon and parked next to Bub's Jeep. They were greeted by Bub's ten year old son. "Hey Jack, Shari, how was your flight?" as he let them into the foyer and took their coats.

"Good. This one couldn't shut up the whole way but otherwise nice. Have you read 'Forward the Foundation' yet? I finished it in spite of chatty Kathy here." Jack told the dark haired boy who looked exactly like his mother.

Sharlynn elbowed him in the ribs. "He's a liar. I did a crossword puzzle."

"Ok." Sam drew the word out as though he thought they were both crazy. "Anyway Dad is in the den with Granpap and mom is in the kitchen making dinner. How come you didn't bring the new girlfriend Jack?" He swiped the book from Jack's hand hungrily though.

"She already had plans with her dad and brother when I asked. I'll bring her up after the holidays or have dinner with your mom and dad when we get home if she'd like to meet you. After my sister, she's probably a little wary of this collection of nuts."

"Hey!" Shari exclaimed in protest.

Jack laughed and went to go find Bub and Uncle James.

"So what's she like?" Sam asked Shari as they headed for the kitchen.

"Well, she's super nice, smart, _really_ pretty. Honestly I have no idea what she sees in that loser."

Sam laughed. "Aw, Jack is a great guy."

"Meh. He's a dork but she seems to like dorks. Hey Kate." Sharlynn said hugging her cousin's dark haired wife who was a former photojournalist but who now taught photography classes at the same university Bub taught engineering at.

"Hello dear. Have you come to help or have you come to hinder?"

"What is it with everyone today?" Sharlynn muttered.

"Shari!" A tiny voice squealed and launched herself at Sharlynn.

"Hey pipsqueak!" she greeted Bub and Kate's five year old daughter.

"Daddy said you and Jack were coming and that Jack has a girlfriend." The little girl told her conspiratorially.

"Oh he did, did he? Well, I'll have you know, your daddy was right on both counts."

"Did he bring her?" The little girl with sandy curls asked.

"Sorry kiddo, Sam couldn't come this time but you might get to meet her when we all get back in town." She said, swinging the little girl up and on her hip.

"Awesome!" Caitlin said and pumped a fist in the air.

Kate laughed. "I take it the new girlfriend is working out then?"

Sharlynn grinned. "I like her."

"You just like that she's not Sara."

"There is that." Shari admitted.

"We should start getting this food out before the guys come in and start taking matters into their own hands. I made a vat of dip for them but it's your brother and Angus. They could eat a sultan out of food." Kate said with a laugh, her dark curls bouncing. "Sam sweetie, will you start setting the table?" She asked of the boy who was working a picture puzzle on the dinette table pretending he wasn't eavesdropping.

"Sure mom." He agreed and started grabbing plates.

"The forks go on the left." She reminded him.

"Get it wrong one time…" He muttered.

Sharlynn laughed. "Are you sure my brother isn't his father? He acts just like him."

"So does his dad."

"Huh. Good point."

\- XxX -

"So you want to explain why you haven't said anything about this girlfriend who happens to be my top student?" Mac asked Jack idly while they watched football with Jack's uncle James.

Jack took a long swig of his beer to stall.

"Leave him alone Bub. If he doesn't want to talk about his love life, he has the right not to." James told his son.

Jack decided to humor his cousin. "When she first moved in she had literally nothing. Her ex kept all her stuff that she couldn't fit in her car. The guys and I went over and raided his condo to get her things back. He was a lunatic. Must have hid it really well too because she's a smart woman. Anyway she was emotionally a hot mess when we met and just wanted a hook up."

"And I take it that's not what you were looking for." Mac said a little surprised as Sara had been his only genuinely serious relationship and that had ended badly almost before it started.

"I don't know Bub. I just, when I looked in her eyes I saw something behind the anger and the open wounds so I waited her out. It took a while."

"Top student, huh?" James asked his son.

"She can write her own ticket dad. The only student I have on her level is the Hailey girl and she's a few years behind Sam."

"Well, she has good taste in guys anyway."

"Thank you Uncle James." Jack said mollified and James winked at him.

"All right, all right, so you like this one. I can't say I blame you, she's really nice and you're a big step up from the last guy she dated. Not that that's saying much mind you."

"Har har." Jack told his cousin but his eyes crinkled in mirth. He was almost glad the cat was out of the bag, at least with his family.

"Soup's on!" Kate announced from the dining room doorway.

"We better get in there before that kid of mine eats everything." Bub told them.

James looked at the empty bowl of dip and scattered chip bags. "The kid isn't the only one eating me out of house and home tonight." He said with a laugh.

Bub and Jack had the decency to look ashamed.

"Oh go eat. There's enough food to feed an army on that table. Not even you three could manage to clear all of it."

\- XxX -

The kids had opened their books and PJs and gone to bed so the adults could do their gift exchange. After the year Kate had pointedly given Shari a dildo because her boyfriend was a jerk, James had announced this was an adults' only event now.

"All right kids, who went first last year?" James asked the four of them.

"It was Shari." Bub and Jack said together.

"Rats." She said, hoping they had forgotten.

If Sam came next year, she would get to go first as the newcomer but she hadn't so Jack volunteered Bub. Mostly because he wanted to see his cousin's face.

"All right, this one is from… Jack." he said and tore the paper off it. Mac started to laugh and showed his wife who also laughed.

"What did my dorktastic brother get you this time?"

Bub held up his prize for her to see. It was a K'nex set with a small motor in it. "This is awesome. Thanks Jack." He said laughing. He was so going to use it in one of his class demonstrations too.

"My turn!" Kate said. She ripped the paper off and looked quizzically at the plain brown box that was taped shut. Bub leaned over and handed her his swiss army knife.

"That's cheating." Shari complained.

"That's teamwork." Jack told her smugly.

Kate opened the box to discover an entire season of _Nat Geo_ 'Kid's Guide to Photography'. She looked at the year and her mouth dropped open.

"You would not _believe_ what I had to pay to get the guy to part with that year." Shari told her nonchalantly.

Kate got up and crushed her husband's cousin in a hug. The year in question was her last year as an active photojournalist before Sam was born and she had taken a job as content provider for that year of the magazine. Half the photos were hers and she'd written most of the articles about camera basics that year too. It had been what convinced her to go into teaching.

"My turn!" Jack told them and grabbed from his pile randomly. He glanced at the tag and was disappointed as it might be the only safe gift. He flipped the book over as he'd opened it and saw the cover emblazoned with 'Every Teenager's Little Black Book On Sex And Dating' and a 'St. Timothy's Catholic bookstore sticker on the bottom of the cover with the price scratched out. "Very funny, Uncle James." Jack said with an embarrassed chuckle.

"Bub helped me pick it out. Next time you tell us when you are seeing someone serious."

Jack swallowed hard when he realized there may not be a next time, that Sam might be the one and that realization hit him like a load of bricks. Everyone was too busy laughing together to notice Jack's epiphany however and Shari jumped up.

"My turn! Finally!" Unable to resist she grabbed the long rectangle box from her brother that was wrapped in Raggedy Ann and Andy paper he had to have dug out from an attic.

Shari peeled the paper off and looked up at her brother in shock.

"I found her at an antique shop looking for something for Sam." he said with a shrug.

Sharlynn jumped up and launched herself at her brother. "You jerk. I hate you." she told him and gave him a big kiss on his cheek and hugged him fiercely.

"If you want, I can go on e-Bay and find you the other two."

"I need a place to display them first, especially in the clothes Momar made them."

Jack still had his grandma's sewing supplies and patterns. He decided to ask Mary to make some doll clothes when he got home.

They sat around late into the night opening the rest of their gifts. Some silly, some sweet. All heartfelt. Bub got his wife one of those baby cameras that plays music. Kate bought Jack a kids carpentry set and so on.

Around one am, they realized they were worn out so James ate the cookies the kids had put out and Jack drank half the glass of milk before they all headed upstairs to crash for a couple hours before the kids got up.


	9. Chapter 9

**The morning after Christmas**

"So how was it?" Jack asked Sam. They were sitting on her couch together, her head on his shoulder.

"The usual." She sighed.

"That sounds ominous." Jack said.

"Yah, well, Mark was his usual charming self, David and Lisa ran around screaming the entire time because dad gave them way too much sugar. Dad bounced between grilling me about you and being exasperated with Mark being a jerk." She shrugged and toyed with Jack's fingers.

"Grilled you about me, huh?" Jack asked mildly.

"Apparently he told George to warn you off which led to me getting into a shouting match with dad about minding his own business."

"Oh." was all Jack had to say about that. George had not warned him in any way whatsoever. Not that it would have worked, which might be why George hadn't bothered.

"So how was your Christmas?" She asked him and Jack obligingly regaled her with stories of his cousin's kids opening their gifts and the odd assortment of things he'd gotten as gag gifts from his family.

"So do you want to open your real gift?" He asked her, having jokingly told her which gift was the one he submitted then fought her for the ceramic potato gravy boat during the white elephant exchange that she had steadfastly NOT traded, even to him.

"Yah sure, you betcha."

"Hey, that's my line." Jack said laughing and handed her the small box with her name on it.

Sam smiled at the glittering paper and carefully slid the ribbon off before she broke the tape on the sides then flipping it over. Jack rolled his eyes at her slow version of unwrapping. He was more a fan of rip the paper off and see what you got. Sam was into the anticipation.

She opened the box to reveal a Seiko watch with a light grey leather band and a simple white face.

"It uh, it's a kinetic watch. You never have to wind it or replace the battery as long as you wear it most of the time." he explained.

Sam gave him a slow, brilliant smile. It was so obvious he really did pay attention to who she was to give her a gift that was useful, a little tech oriented and beautiful in its simplicity.

"Thank you Jack." she said, her voice full of quiet awe. "I love it." She leaned in and kissed him in thank you.

Jack hummed in appreciation but much more of that and he wouldn't be opening his gift for hours so he kept his hands to himself even though he wanted to pull her close and deepen the kiss. "My turn." He said, grinning against her lips.

"You are such a child." she told him, chuckling. She reached down beside her and brought up a small box of her own.

Jack snatched it out of her hands. "Gimmi." He said with a grin and tugged the paper off the small jeweler box.

"It's kind of a combination of my two favorite memories of you." she admitted as he opened it.

Jack looked at the contents of the box for a very very long time and understood exactly what the symbolism meant. Even if she was never able to say the words to him, he knew.

He looked up into her blue eyes, swirling with uncertainty. "I love them. Thank you." he said with a grin, his face a mixture of wonder and love. Jack gently set the box down and took her cheek into his hand before leaning in and kissing her deeply. Accepting her unspoken declaration.

Unnoticed by the humans who were enthusiastically removing each other's clothing, an orange paw reached up from under the coffee table and swatted at the open box that contained a pair of cufflinks shaped like guitar picks.


End file.
